At The Very Least
by Distopian Heart
Summary: In this world, the boys have very little in a run down town in Minnesota. Logan and Carlos are pole dancers and Kendall and James are gangsters with broken families. See the problem? Kogan, Jarlos. SLASH. AU.
1. At Least I'm Sexy

**Heyo! So, I got the idea for this, so I'm just gonna write it! Hope you like it! *bows***

**But, be warned, this is a multichapter story. :D Please continue reading! Please?**

**Oh, also! I just realized that Lady Gaga has the same watch as Carlos does in the LoveGame video! Except hers is yellow! Trust me, bro, it's fucking CREEPY!**

**Man, I feel like this intro should be longer. Uh…what do I say? Um…I'm listening to music that makes me horny. xD Kidding! I'm kidding! Jeez. Alright, screw this. Just read.**

**Warnings: slash, smex, guy on guy, hooker shit, other stuff of that genre**

**Disclaimer: I don't own BTR! I wish I did, but I don't.**

"Woo! Yeah, baby, shake that ass!"

Logan smirked, rolling his hips against the pole he was gripping in his hands. When people said things like that, he knew he was doing his job right. He did a raunchy move, which included the lifting of one thigh and the licking of a certain lucky metal pole.

The boy looked over into the audience, his eyes locking on a single customer. He loved doing things like this, making men feel like he was undressing them with his eyes and grinding on the pole as if he were really horny, just to make the customers feel special.

It worked, he'll tell you that.

A simple dance move made the guy smirk and harden.

Logan didn't know the guy, but hell, he never knew the guys that walked in here. That's what happened when you worked in a club as a pole dancer.

He detached himself from the pole, followed by disappointed noises and a shower of money. He snatched a few bills out of the air and stalked away, a pro at walking in platform heels. He'd count tonight's profit backstage.

He breathed a sigh of relief as his lungs met fresh, air-conditioned oxygen in the backstage dressing room. He was the fan favorite, and he was being modest when he said that. He was a headline dancer, along with his best friend, Carlos Garcia.

Carlos was sitting backstage, listening to his iPod. His head was nodding steadily to the beat.

Logan slapped the top of the Latino's head. "Yo. You're up." He said, taking out one of Carlos' earbuds.

Carlos groaned. "You're kidding me!" He whined. "That couldn't have been ten minutes!"

"It was twenty, actually." Logan retorted, sitting down with another thankful sigh in his chair. "Now go. I'll wait for you."

"Fucking douche…" Carlos grumbled under his breath as he stuffed his heels on and walked out.

Logan chuckled. He knew that Carlos was just grumpy because he had to go on _after_ Logan, meaning that he probably wouldn't get paid much. But that was his problem, not Logan's.

Alright, a little background on Logan and Carlos. They were both seniors in high school, both seventeen years old. They knew it was illegal for them to be working as dancers, but it was good money and they didn't have many other places to go. They had been best friends since they were little kids, and had decided to go into this… 'profession' together. Logan had a little sister to help raise, even if she was only two years younger than him, (his mother was never home and his father was a drunk) and Carlos was the oldest of five. They needed this money. It was amazing luck that they were good at being sexy.

Logan hummed his favorite song as he counted his profit for that little round. Two hundred thirty four dollars. Not bad.

He heard the audience whistling and cheering for his friend. He smiled. Carlos was a hair away from being at Logan's level of popularity, the second most wanted dancer of the regulars.

Oh, yes, the regulars.

There was this one, quite wealthy man named Gustavo who _always _tipped generously. _Especially_ when he had a certain white ass grinding on the pole on his table inches from his fatty face. Another regular had a preference towards Carlos. Logan was slightly scared of him because of his size, and Carlos called him 'Freight Train'.

The other regulars, Logan didn't care about. Those two were the bigger tippers for him and Carlos, and that was what mattered to him.

And no, he wasn't greedy. He was saving up his money so he could pay for college, and then medical school. His biggest dream was to become a doctor.

Funny how he was a stripper at the moment, huh?

Twenty minutes later, Carlos walked in, dollar bills poking out of his corset. He always wore more feminine clothes – almost crossdressing – on the job. That's what made him such a big favorite with the men. Logan personally found it unnerving to be so close to dressing as a girl, what with his already almost-feminine body. Carlos, however, was cool with it, so Logan never said anything.

"Alright. Let's go home." Carlos said, a huge grin on his face.

Logan snorted, looking up at his friend. "You're kidding me, right?" He asked. Carlos, who wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, tilted his head to the side in confusion. Logan sighed, putting his magazine down. "You can't go out like that. You'll either get mugged or raped. Most likely both."

"Oh." Carlos looked down at himself, laughing. "Whoops. Be right back." He shot behind the changing room curtains, making Logan chuckle at his forgetfulness. Logan had already changed, so he was just waiting for Carlos to be ready.

Soon, Carlos was back out in Logan's sight. The Latino was still struggling with his red sweatshirt, but at least he was clothed. Logan grabbed him by the shoulder and dragged him out.

"So…" Carlos started, a smirk playing on his face, "Gustavo was there again tonight."

"Of course he was. He always knows when I'm performing." Logan shuddered, and not just from the cold Minnesota air. "It's creepy, dude."

"Don't I know it." Carlos snickered. "I'm just glad Freight Train has a set schedule."

"Yeah, well I have a stalker. What."

"At least I'm sexy!"

That was it.

Logan looked over at Carlos darkly. Call him a nerd, a dork, a faggot, a bitch, but only two things dug under his skin. Being called un-sexy, and…

"Logan, you know I'm kidding right?" Carlos asked, knowing that he had accidentally crossed a line. Best friends since before they could remember, and he _still_ slipped up.

"Absolutely, Carlos…" The brunette said softly, pulling his jacket closer around him. "Absolutely." He looked over at the other side of the street. It was the dirtier part of the town (and the whole town was dirty in general), so buildings were run down and the street itself looked broken. He saw five or six figure huddled around each other. Logan elbowed his friend, his eyes glued to the people.

"Ow!" Carlos yelped. "What was that…for…" His voice trailed off when he saw the people Logan was staring at. "Dude! Stop staring!"

"Let's just bolt, 'kay?" Logan hissed under his breath, looking back at Carlos.

"Don't have to tell me twice." The Latino whispered.

The two ran. They knew that those people were dangerous beings that shouldn't be messed with, lest they wanted to be women so fast their heads would spin.

Kendall looked around, keeping his face passive. He'd never been to this club before (he was too occupied with business to go to clubs), but from what he'd heard, this one was good. It was called _Demonz_ for a reason, he guessed. The dancers up were all wearing devilish outfits.

"Yo, Knight, wake up." Kendall's best friend, James Diamond, said, slapping the blonde boy on the shoulder. The boy looked over at the brunette.

"Yeah, Diamond?" Kendall replied, feeling uncomfortable in a place like this. It was clean for the town (and district) it was in, but that didn't change the fact that it was a gay bar and club. Don't get him wrong, Kendall was gay and loved to see other men get all triple-X with poles and, if he was lucky, other men, but in _public_?

He'll save that for the computer.

"I heard the two best dancers are here tonight." James grinned.

Kendall smiled. "Nice."

Just a little background on these two young men. Kendall Knight and James Diamond were best friends, and had been since they could remember. They never betrayed each other, mostly because they were the most they had at times. Kendall took care of his mother and his younger sister at home, as the man of the family. He had no father, but it was a story he didn't like to reflect on. James' parents were druggies that didn't give a damn one way or another, so he had had to grow up pretty fast.

Oh, and one more thing.

Both boys were part of a local gang and carried guns everywhere.

Anyway. Kendall and James sat down at a table, their eyes glued to the stage. Kendall glanced around. He and his best friend were both eighteen, technically and legally adults, but that didn't change the fact that they were still high school students. If anyone here recognized them, they might get arrested.

Not that they hadn't already been thrown in juvy more than once before, but Kendall didn't need any more on his plate at the moment.

"AND NOW, MAKE ROOM IN YOUR FANTASIES FOR LOGAN!"

Kendall glanced up at the ceiling. Speakers. Damn.

He looked down at the stage just as a slender brunette stepped up on stage. Immediately, Kendall's heart beat faster and traveled up his throat while about eighty percent of his blood flowed to his crotch. He shifted slightly in his seat.

Logan, however, didn't notice the newcomer at first. He did the usual – warm the audience up, then get into the raunchier stuff. For some reason, he had the urge to d something dirtier than regular stuff, so he brought everything he knew out on the table. It was only half way through his performance that he noticed the two boys from his school sitting at the table in the back. His body continued its movements on a sort of autopilot, while his mind ran wild.

_What are they doing here? Oh, god, Logan, don't mess up! Avert the eyes, Logan! AVERT THE EYES!_

He looked away, feeling torn. He didn't want to insult or anger the boys, both of which he knew were part of the local gang he and Carlos had seen the previous night, but the blonde one (Kendall Knight, his brain told him) was beautiful. Logan couldn't keep his eyes off him. But those boys could spread that he and Carlos worked in a gay strip club.

Wait.

But…

HOLY FUCK.

Logan could hear buzzing in his ears as he ended the performance and stumbled backstage. He vaguely registered Carlos' concerned fussing over him, but could only muster out in a small voice:

"Two gangsters. Kendall Knight, James Diamond."

He looked up at his best friend desperately. "Don't get hurt."

Carlos' eyes widened. After a second, he nodded. "Right. Got it. Thanks, bro."

Logan nodded absentmindedly, staring off into the distance. He couldn't help but think about the Knight boy…and the damage he and his friend could do…

**And that's a wrap! So, how you guys liking it so far? Pretty good? :D**

**Just keep reading, please!**

**Kendall: Sweet! I'm a badass!**

**James: And we get guns! What in the WORLD is up? *fist pounds Kendall***

**Carlos: Why am I the crossdresser?**

**Because, in my mind, you'd be a perfect little gay man whore. **

**Carlos: …*eye twitch***

**Logan: *giggles* I'm a pole dancer. *cracks up* As if!**

**Kendall: *sneaks up behind Logan* *grabs his hips* *whispers in his ear: What about for me?***

**Logan: *smirks* Earn it, big boy.**

**Kendall: You got it.**

**Damn. Why do I like Cargan again?**

**James: You like Cargan?**

***shrugs* For some reason, I find it cool to watch your bottom top the ultimate bottom.**

**Logan: I am NOT the ultimate bottom!**

**Me, James, Carlos, and Kendall: Yeah, you are, bro.**

**Anyway! Thanks for reading! Have pleasant days and sexy nights! xD Nah, just kidding. Rate, review, love!**


	2. At Least I'm Not Boring

**HOLY CRAP. YOU GUYS LOVED THIS SHIT. THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?**

**Haha, just kidding. The first chapter was pretty epic, I know. Oh! And, to lengthen the intros up here, I'm gonna respond to you guys' comments and reviews! So, here we go:**

**WalkingTragedyButISmile- I will continue writing this. It's kinda my plan. So…yeah.**

**Fang lover23- Love the Spanish. Amigos/amigas gotta stick together. And yes, Logan is extremely dirty. Seriously. Especially when he's, like, high in Big Time Fever. Anyone else think that? Eh, whatever.**

**Hikari of Death- Thank you for the compliment! Even if I don't know exactly what "OMFMFG" stands for…I appreciate it. Hey, see if you can translate this: ILPWLMSY! And yes, that actually is a sensible acronym.**

**hellfirehalo188- "Surprisingly"? **_**Surprisingly**_**? The fuck did you expect? Seriously! Well, guess what? You have a **_**surprisingly**_** cool username!**

**DinosaurShapedChicken- I am actually a big fan of yours. So, to see that you like my story enough to say the things that you did made me smile. :D And I'm glad you think it's sexy and gross at the same time. That's actually my sense of humor. But if you see my humor, you'll see that I have more sarcasm in my spoken words than my written. Oh, and I think you'll see some Jarlos in this chapter… *smirks***

**PIRATEofHOGWARTS- Thanks for the capital letters. It warms my heart and makes me feel like I'm standing naked in a pool of puppies…wait, that's kinda gross. Sorry.**

**MinuteCloser2Failing- I know! I'm surprised that no one thought of this before me! But, here I am, the only one where the boys are in a small ghetto part of Minnesota! (Is there even a ghetto in Minnesota…?)**

**bowsie22- FINALLY! SOMEONE agrees with me! Geez, you should hear my friends debate about this subject…some of them guys… o.O**

**CrayonsPink- Oh my god! My story got you so excited that, though you use periods, you have terrible grammar! Thank you! *bows***

**The Brat Prince- Should I be scared that my words are eating people? Especially my fans? *shrugs* Whatever. Anyway, you'll see more gangster-y stuff in this chapter.**

**Eneune- I'm updating now! Is that soon enough? I'm seriously concerned here!**

**fiyafreak92- Yes. Logan is very smexy, especially when he's a gay stripper. xD**

**Warnings: slash, smex, guy on guy, hooker shit, other stuff of that genre**

**Disclaimer: I don't own BTR! I wish I did, but I don't.**

"C'mon, Logan. Grow a pair."

Logan slammed his locker shut. "Carlos!" He hissed, exasperated. "I have a good reason to be scared! Think about it! One word gets out, we won't live to get to graduation!"

The Latino snorted. "Are you kidding me? You're the smart one, aren't you?" He asked. Logan raised an eyebrow. Carlos glanced around at the hallway, then turned Logan away from the crowd. "Knight and Diamond are in a gang, right?" Logan nodded. "Gangsters aren't gay. Chances are, if they leak that we work there, someone's gonna ask them where they got the info. We know that they probably can't lie well, look at them. They'd _have_ to say that they were there. And if they do that, then they're as good as dead."

Logan blinked. He hadn't thought of that. "I…I guess you're right."

"Damn straight I'm right." Carlos huffed, looking triumphant.

"I still think we should avoid them, though. I don't feel like becoming anyone's bitch at the moment." Logan said, looking at his feet. "I'm too young."

"Oh, please, you're seventeen. Man up." Carlos sighed. They turned around in unison to be almost face to face with the two boys that had just been talking about (Kendall and James were taller). The two shorter boys slammed against the wall in shock.

_They look pissed!_ Logan thought.

"H-hey, guys." Carlos stuttered, then cleared his throat, looking down at the floor.

"Wh-what brings you t-t-to th-this side of the spectrum?" Logan asked, his voice wavering. Carlos and Logan were both fairly invisible, but Kendall and James were two of the most popular males in the school.

"We saw you. You saw us." Kendall grunted simply. _Oh, god, he's an imbecile! _Logan sobbed in his head. _He won't know how to kill me without crushing my skull to dust first!_

"You were actually pretty good." James said bluntly. "Better than some other people I've seen."

"Pay us well, you get more." Carlos suddenly blurted. Logan's eyes flew open wide and he elbowed his friend.

"Excuse us one minute." He smiled nervously at the older boys before turning Carlos around. "The fuck are you thinking, you whore?" He hissed under his breath, slapping the Latino upside the head. "You _want _your ass to whistle as you walk down the halls?"

"If it was open 'cause of the brunette, hell yeah." Carlos winked. "He's hot!"

Logan facepalmed. "My best friend is not only an idiot, but a _slutty_ idiot." They turned around to face the other boys, Logan flinching slightly.

"Listen," Kendall started, sounding much less pissed off (and a bit more open to letting Logan live with his virginity intact) than before, "we don't want to make anyone our bitches."

"Yeah. He's always the diplomat." James grumbled.

Kendall gave a sour look to his friend. "I'm surprised you even know what 'diplomat' even means." He retorted.

"I'm surprised _you_ do." James shot back.

"Dude, you suck at comebacks." Kendall rolled his eyes, then looked back at Logan and Carlos. Carlos, being the extroverted little bugger he is, was already standing normally in front of Kendall and James like he would if he were talking to Logan, but Logan was shyer and easier to make anxious, so he was still pressing himself as close to the wall as possible. "Anyway. Carlos is right. We would get thrown in jail, and not by the police."

"_We'd_ be the bitches." James interrupted.

Kendall nodded gravely. "And, even if that weren't the case, we wouldn't rat you guys out anyway. We're not like that." He smiled. "We _would_, however, enjoy the chance to get to know you two."

Logan was shocked. "Y-you…_what_?" He gasped.

"What time?" Carlos asked.

James raised his eyebrows in surprise that the Latino would react so quickly (and well) to the condition. "You don't want to know what you get in return?" He asked.

"I do!" Logan squeaked. Carlos rolled his eyes and looked at the genius.

"How many times do I have to tell you? Grow a pair and get over it! It'll give us a chance to breathe fresher air!" He cried, pulling Logan from the wall.

"You're the one who practically crossdresses!" Logan hissed quietly. Carlos' eye twitched slightly in anger, but turned towards the other boys.

"Give us a time before I beat the shit out of my only friend." He growled.

Kendall looked worried. _They seem less stable then they did from the other end of the hall…but that's probably how our friendship seems, too… _He thought, glancing at James. "What about Friday? After school? We could-"

"We're not free Friday…" Logan interrupted. Kendall held in a grin. It was nice to hear him actually talk, even if his eyes were avoiding the blonde at all costs.

"You always work on the same nights?" James asked.

Carlos nodded. "It's easier that way." He said, smiling at Logan.

"Your boss doesn't mind?" Kendall asked.

"You kidding me? She loves it! She thinks we're gonna end up hooking up." Carlos shrugged.

"As if." Logan chuckled. "No way in hell I'd ever want that."

Carlos glared. "That popularity's gotten to your head, bitch." He said.

Logan grinned. "Shut up, bro." He said, elbowing his friend. The two smiled at each other. Logan looked back at Kendall and James. "But you can meet us out back after we go on."

Kendall blinked. His emotions had been temporarily blinded by the beauty of Logan's smile. And James recognized this. So he spoke up.

"Uh…yeah. What time would that be?" He asked.

"Maybe around…five?" Carlos guessed. Logan nodded.

"About then." He said.

"Cool." James said, clapping his hands together. "Until then, boys." He grabbed Kendall by the shoulder and led him away to their class. Once the pair were out of earshot, the brunette slapped Kendall on the back of his neck, waking him up. "Dude! The fuck was that?" He hissed.

Kendall shook his head, staring at his feet. "No clue."

James sighed. Sometimes, he wondered why he was friends with Kendall in the first place. But he knew why – Kendall was the only one that could put up with his slightly vain ways. Anyone else would be at their wit's end within days. "Stay focused next time, please. The shorter one was cute. And funny. I don't wanna fuck that up."

"Yeah, I know." Kendall shook his head. "Sorry. I don't know what happened."

"Just make sure it doesn't happen again." James growled, stomping into the classroom, Kendall on his heels like a shadow. A taller, blonde, and more muscular shadow.

Logan let out a long breath. Finally home. It was one of his safe havens, even if it wasn't technically…_safe_. He laid down on the couch.

"Hey, Logan!"

He looked up and saw his younger sister, Jo, standing there. He smiled. As much as his days sucked, Jo seemed to make them better in her own way. "Hey, Jo." He greeted.

"So, I'm gonna go hang out with Guitar Dude, okay?" She pulled a puppy dog face, something that Logan could never say no to.

"Alright." He sighed, sitting up. "Be safe. Use his real name. Don't do anything stupid."

She rolled her eyes, laughing. She hugged me before walking out. "Love ya!"

"Love you too." He called back. He sighed, lying back down.

"Phew! Thought she'd never leave!"

Carlos jumped from Logan didn't know where and onto his legs. He groaned.

"Ow." Logan tried getting him off, but he was too heavy for the genius' tired limbs.

"See why you should work out more? You get exhausted after one gym class." Carlos pointed out.

"And yet, I'm a pole dancer." Logan retorted. Carlos laughed. "What are you doing here? I thought you went the other way. You know, the way to your _house_."

"That house is not a home, Logan." Carlos sighed dramatically.

"Imagine if you will," Logan laughed.

"What I mean is…" Carlos hesitated, and Logan could see the wheels turning in the Latino's head. "Okay, shut up." He finally gave up. "But I'm bored! And it's Wednesday! And you know how I get on Wednesdays."

"Unfortunately," Logan grumbled under his breath, glaring at the door. The poor, innocent door.

"What?"

"Nothing!" Logan cried, brightening, smiling at his best friend. Carlos raised an eyebrow, but let it go.

"C'mon, let's do something!" He whined, pulling on Logan's sleeve like a little kid and pouting in the same fashion. "Let's go shopping!"

"We won't be able to without looking ridiculous." Logan reasoned. "You're gonna make me go to a fucking girl's store to buy you shit for your sisters or mom. And if not that, then a sex toy shop run by your uncle-"

"That was one time, dude. Let it go already!"

"I was _scared,_ Carlos. Those guys were ready to-"

"Alright, I get it. No need to remind me…"

Logan huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Anyway." He said. "Why can't we just stay here?"

"Because your house is boring."

"If my house were alive, I'm sure it'd think you're boring, too."

Carlos laughed. "Fine, fine. I get it. You're too traumatized to go shopping." He said. "But can we at least eat something? I'm starving!"

"That's what happens when you start a food fight." Logan pointed.

"I know, right?" Carlos grinned. "I can't believe they didn't figure out I started it! They're such idiots to think that it was…whoever it was…"

"Wayne Wayne, Carlos," Logan sighed. "His name is Wayne Wayne."

"More like Conceited Conceited." Carlos huffed. "The hell kinda name is that?"

"It's a nickname, you dumbass." Logan said. "His friends came up with it for him. And plus, he's in a gang. Don't slander his name, especially not literally."

"Not the same as Kendall and James, I hope?"

"Nah. Wayne Wayne is part of a gang that's part of the drug circle. Kendall and James' people steer clear of that shit."

"You seem to know a lot about the gang circles in our town, Logan."

"I'm surprised you don't."

There was a moment of silence. Finally, Carlos broke the silence by giggling.

"'Slander… Since when were we living in the 1800's?" He laughed.

"Carlos." Logan began in a warning tone. "If you don't shut up now, I'm going to wring your neck and drop your corpse off at James' house."

"You know where he lives?"

"Not yet, but I'll have to once I poison your food."

"You know you love me."

"I'm not sure I do."

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"Absolutely."

**Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaannd…CUT! Okay, so…how you like it? This chapter **_**did**_** have a bit more Jarlos, and the end was just to show the friendship between Logan and Carlos, just because I thought it'd be cute. Also! Bonus! It gave me an idea to do for a story, which should be out by tonight!**

**xD Haha, don't ask. Just enjoy!**

**Kendall: I'm curious as to what this new story could be…**

**It's a oneshot.**

**Logan: Ah. Very interesting.**

**Shut up.**

**Carlos: So…are we not gonna get famous in this story?**

**No, you're not. Why? Sad about that?**

**James: I AM!**

**Well, too bad.**

**James: Bitch.**

**Kendall: This chapter had no stripping… *pouts***

**There'll be plenty in the next chapter, Kendall.**

**Kendall: *smirks***

**Logan: Oh, god. Are we gonna get raped?**

**Not yet. I MEAN…UH…NO…**

**Carlos: WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'YET'?**

**I didn't say 'yet'! Get out my face! *turns to readers* GET OUT! RATE AND REVIEW!**


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